Family 2015

Family 2015

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

This Isn't Really What's on my Mind...

But, it will help you understand why I'm having such trouble getting it out.

I am busy.  Yes, it is true that many of my obligations from this crazy school year are just about over.  In fact, I expected that I would feel considerable relief by the time I reached this point in the year.  And I do.  Sort of.

The truth is that even when I'm not doing "extra" things, my life is still busy.  Yes, my kids are older and much more able to do things on their own.  But, they're still here.  They're busy. They need to be taken places.  They need help with school.  If they're boys, they have to be forced into the shower when I'm already tired.   They ask a lot of questions.  They don't pay attention to questions that have already been asked in their presence and then they ask them again. Then, they wonder why I lose my cool a little when someone asks me for the 5th time what we're having for dinner. (Don't they know by now that I have no flippin' idea what we're having for dinner until I have started to cook it??)  They want to talk to me.  All the time.  I love talking to my children.  Love it!  But, I'm a little outnumbered and my personality  requires a lot of solitude.  I don't get any.

I have figured out the problem.  My brain is tired.  I can't hash out all that's going through my brain because I'm living in a cerebral traffic jam.

This explains why when I do have a minute alone, like now, what I usually end up doing is sitting and staring.  I drink coffee.  I stare some more.  I think of something great I should do.  Then I give up on it and stare a little.

I'm certain this season will not last forever, and I'm even more certain that I will be sad when it passes.  But, right now it is still gonna take me a little longer to tell you what I really want to tell you.  I'll get back with you when the stare passes...;)