My husband is a GREAT communicator. No, he really is. I have often had conversations with friends where they express frustration that their husband isn't good at talking to them, they have to drag things out of him, he doesn't even LIKE to talk, etc. I love to encourage people about their marriages, to be able to say, "Hey, I understand... this is how we handle that... yep - we've been down that road" and stuff like that. But, in regards to encouragement for this issue, I got nothin'. Your husband doesn't talk much? I can't relate.
So, it shouldn't surprise me, then, that my youngest son - aka my husband's "mini-me" - inherited this trait. He also inherited his Dad's night owl which will be a huge battle come Septemeber 4th, but I digress. Anyway, Nic is currently out of town for a week of residency at his master's program and so I am enjoying having the bed all to myself. Sort of. Last night, around 1 am, Pierce crawled in bed with me. He hadn't been asleep yet (I am not lying about the night owl business) and was needing to talk about his "nervous."
I am not a night owl. At all. But, in keeping with trying to be a good Mom and all that, I made myself wake up and listen. "What are you nervous about, buddy?"
"Well, I just don't think I'm ready to handle Kindergarten. I mean, what if there are bad kids in my class? I will probably miss my teacher from young 5's. How will I buy lunch if I don't have money? Who will I sit with at lunch? What if I don't want to play what the other kids are playing at recess? Also, even when I tell my heart that you will pick me up pretty soon, it still misses you."
OMG. I am GLAD that I never have to wonder what is bothering my son, but are you kidding me??? At 1 am??? 7 weeks before school starts???
But, I could hear the earnestness in his little voice, so we talked. About all of it. By the end, he seemed reasonably comforted and was finally able to fall asleep.
But then I was wide awake and just laid there for a while listening to him breathe. It is a tricky business, this parenting. That is a PERSON laying there next to me, and 4 others sleeping peacefully at other places in the house. They are so intricate. So individual. So amazing. So complicated. It is so overwhelming to try to guide them.
It drives me to my knees and makes me so grateful that I'm not trying to do this alone. Nope, the creator of the universe is also the creator of each of them and He will show us the way.